Is there a difference in how you relate to them one-on-one and how you express your opinion of the cultural sub-groups they fit into?
Do you have a Christian friend and mock Christians as uneducated sheep?
Do you have a liberal or conservative friend who you personally interact with respectfully but then post content that could be viewed by them as arrogant condescension?
Do you post divisive and mocking “us” vs. “them” memes and gifs about the group your friend is affiliated with?
Those friends are not stupid and they don’t live under a rock. They see your posts. They hear what you say. And when you talk to them in real life, they know what you REALLY think about them.
They know you are duplicitous.
(unless you’ve blocked them because YOU ALREADY KNOW you are duplicitous)
Look at the content you post, from the other person’s point of view.
Listen to what you say, from the other person’s perspective.
Often, we have the ability to recognize content that might be viewed as an attack on others who differ from us. If you know it crosses that line, DON’T post it. DON’T say it.
Not sure? If you genuinely care about this other person, be brave. ASK them if they’ve seen or heard anything you posted or said that contradicted the respect you express toward them in person.
Maybe they’ll tell you the truth.
or maybe, they will protect themselves by remaining silent because they know they can’t trust you.
I’ve written about this before, with examples, in my posts entitled:
“duplicity. duplicity everywhere” and
“People talking without speaking. People hearing without listening”