My pastor asked a question yesterday morning:
“Are you standing at the boundary between what you can accomplish on your own naturally and what God can accomplish THROUGH you supernaturally?”
yes. yes, I am.
Logic says, avoid risk.
Fear says, avoid change.
Above the voices of logic and fear, I can still hear God’s small, still voice saying “Trust me.”
I don’t usually have the courage to give up something good, in order to make room in my life for something better. I don’t often have the courage to say no to the immediate good in order to make room for the long term better.
(cryptic, I know. but I’m not ready to talk about the details, so this is all you’re gonna get right now.)
Of course, when I can clearly see the “better” that God has for me, it’s SO much easier to take the big step away from the old and toward the new.
The problem comes when what’s next is nowhere in my line of sight when I should be giving up the “good” thing. I tend to ignore the subtle hints God supplies me with, only to see them in hindsight.
And then there’s trying to discern if the thing that is so logically and clearly “something better” only seems like better, but is really Satan trying to derail me because I’m on actually track with what God’s equipping me to do.
It’s possible there’s a hint the size of an elephant in the room. I’m ignoring it. (Who am I kidding? Elephants might be quiet, but they tend to stink up the place.) It’s possible Satan is waving a shiny thing in my peripheral vision.
In the past, God has had to take away the “good” thing. And, in the process, pry my white knuckled fingers off of whatever it is I’m clinging to.
This is especially difficult when there weren’t any hints, or when I’ve been ignoring them. I don’t like it when I’m blindsided with change.
And then there’s the waiting for “next.”
I really hate it when that happens.
Praying for discernment. And for the Lord to provide an answer to a question in a very specific, supernatural way.
I’m trying not to place my human limitations on God. Because He can do ANYthing. And I would rather play a small part in His story that the main character of my own.
I think we both know that I am going through this right now as well. I am white knuckled. I am blindsided. I am afraid and hate the thought of waiting for “next”. I am confused and paralyzed with the thought of losing the control of my life that I thought I once had.
Thanks for posting this today. It’s so nice to know I’m not alone in these feelings, no matter what the situation.
Julie, so good! I tell you, You have an amazing ability to put into words what everyone is dealing with and just don’t/won’t talk about! Thank you for putting it out there for us!
I don’t have your email here at work, but wanted to let you know–we booked our Disney trip May 5-12 (82 days from now!). Staying at the Fort Wilderness Cabins. SO EXCITED. Haven’t been there since 1996. I would LOVE to actually meet you! Wanna do lunch? Dinner?
Oh, and to reply to your post, Whoa. Discernment is such a hard thing sometimes. Especially in the face of lovely, shiny things!
As I just skimmed this post (c’mon, it’s late for a teacher) and a few lines from a song came to mind.
“Don’t give up on great for good
The author of your dreams is waiting.
And if it doesn’t look like you thought it would
No hesitating, he’s waiting for you.”
Just thought I’d share!