Pragmatic Compendium

inspiring the pragmatic practice of intimacy with Christ

Friday Funnies: hand sanitizer at church and Christianeze.


Need a few more chuckles today? Check out Friday Funnies hosted by Homesteaders Heart!

If you’ve got time to hang out for a few minutes, check out what else makes me laugh: Pragmatic Compendium’s “laugh!” category.

April 29, 2011 Posted by | christian living, laugh!, youtube | , , , | 2 Comments

I’m asceard.

Amy, at From the Desk of Mom has inspired me to:

1. buy a domain for my blog.

2. watch a detailed video series on the transfer from wordpress.com to wordpress.org (which used my ISP, GoDaddy in the example!)

3. Search for, FIND and download my current (and favorite) wordpress template, which was not available on wordpress.org’s template collection.

4. learn about the redirect service offered by wordpress so all my links won’t die.

5. pause, paralyzed in fear of screwing up the entire process.

April 28, 2011 Posted by | blogosphere, laugh!, learning curve, microactions, poor me some whine, status updates, what I've learned | , , , | 1 Comment

I’m having a major childhood flashback.

PinkGirl.

That nut doesn’t fall far from the tree.

I just caught her reading in bed. 10 years old. 10:43pm on a school night. She’s just started reading The Last Olympian (Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Book 5) and she BEGGED me not to make her stop till she gets past “the good part.”

Oh, I remember that. Except I used to hide under the blanket with a flashlight. She has a reading light clipped to a shelf next to her bed.

I understand. And while part of me is upset with her for still being awake, part of me is over the top THRILLED that she loves to read this much. She’s going to love reading her whole life.

Call me a bad mom. I don’t care. I said: “You may NOT be mean to me in the morning and you WILL get up EXACTLY when I ask you to. Get to a stopping point fast.”

11:02pm. I just heard the reading light being turned off.

April 27, 2011 Posted by | books, family, flashback, laugh!, pragmatic commotion, pragmatic parenting, status updates | , , , , , , | 2 Comments

5 minutes. one counter with magical magnetic properties.

oh, you get to see the ugly now. My last few 5 minute posts have been in line with my goal to spring/deep clean my kitchen, but today’s post is about a DAILY struggle.

I have to believe that my kitchen counter is not the only one with magical magnetic properties. Magical in that it attracts all materials, not just metal.

We’ve got paper, plastic, wood, glass, medicine, vitamins, food items, cleaning supplies, a doorknob (don’t ask), even flat out GARBAGE. Maybe if I put the garbage can ON the counter…

But I digress.

I decided to find out if I could clear it in 5 minutes. If so, maybe it won’t seem like such a daunting task in the future. Maybe if I SEE that I can do it in 5 minutes, I’ll be more likely to do it every day.

Bwahahaha! (in our house, that would be referred to the Zack and Cody laugh. a statement, followed by a brief pause, and then a burst of mocking laughter.)

Did I make it within 5 minutes?

I’ll admit right now that this was challenging, simply due to the distance I had to travel to put some of this stuff where it actually goes. Which is probably WHY it got dumped on the counter in the first place.

Nobody wanted to go the distance.

I did cheat a little bit and put the items that were supposed to go upstairs ON the stairs to carry up the next time I go.

You watch, the next 5 minute post will start with a picture of my cluttered staircase.

What can YOU clean in 5 minutes?

And I just want to state right now, that I am confident that I can not clear my minivan of CARbage in 5 minutes.

UPDATE @ 2:34pm: Right now, there’s only one thing on my kitchen counter. A crock pot full of Cream Cheese Chicken


Find more tips from other bloggers over at Works for Me Wednesday, hosted by Kristen at We Are THAT Family. MY previous Works for Me Wednesday posts are HERE.

Works for Me Wednesday posts prior to February 2009 are archived at Rocks In My Dryer.

April 27, 2011 Posted by | 5 minutes, clean house, freakishly organized, home sweet home, intentional living, laugh!, microactions, poor me some whine | , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

5 minutes. 1 drawer. and a kapoosh.

Still applying my long time practice of microactions to tackle deep cleaning my kitchen. Today, I had 5 minutes, so I completely emptied and cleaned out the knife drawer.

“BEFORE” photos:

If THAT photo doesn’t show how bad it really was, THIS one surely does:

I followed the same steps as yesterday’s 5 minute drawer cleanup: emptied the drawer, cleaned the bottom, scrubbed and dried the drawer organizers and put everything back. This time, I didn’t get rid of anything. It may have been dirty, but it’s stayed organized like this since we had the kitchen redone in November of 2000.

“AFTER” photo:

2000. I wonder if that’s when I last cleaned the bottom of this drawer. no . . . NO. I’ve definitely cleaned it since then. That’s my story and I’m stickin to it.

What can YOU clean in 5 minutes?

But that was only the knife DRAWER. My favorite knives live in my Kapoosh (Amazon link) And I know I clean THAT multiple times per year. because it’s fun. and easy. and it takes less than FIVE MINUTES to clean it.

April 26, 2011 Posted by | 5 minutes, clean house, freakishly organized, laugh!, microactions | , , , , , | 1 Comment

how to be the best mom EVER! (for a few minutes anyway)

Her children rise up and call her blessed…
Proverbs 31:28

…because she threw frozen chicken wings in a crock pot, smothered them with a bottle of barbecue sauce and cooked them on high for four hours selflessly dedicated four hours to cooking perfect, fall off the bone tender chicken wings dripping in finger-licking good sauce.

Prep/Work time? 5 minutes
End result? sticky fingers and happy kids

I’m ALWAYS on the lookout for “dump it in the crock pot and walk away” recipes, so if you have one, LINK UP or post it in a comment!!!


Click on over to check out the recipes at Tempt My Tummy Tuesday hosted by Lisa at Blessed With Grace MY past Tempt My Tummy posts can be found HERE.

Need more? Head over to Tasty Tuesday hosted by Jen at Balancing Beauty and Bedlam MY previous Tasty Tuesday posts are HERE. Tasty Tuesday posts prior to April of 2009 can be found at Forever . . . Wherever

April 25, 2011 Posted by | 5 minutes, food, recipes | , , , , , , | 3 Comments

5 minutes. 1 drawer: would you like chocolate sprinkles with that?

As usual, I don’t have time to devote a full day (or 7) to concentrated spring cleaning, so I’m applying my long time practice of microactions to tackle deep cleaning my kitchen. Today, I had 5 minutes, so I completely emptied and cleaned out the flatware drawer. I forgot to include a clock in the picture to prove that it only took 5 minutes, so you’re just gonna have to trust me.

FIVE minutes.

Includes emptying out the drawer, cleaning the drawer bottom, scrubbing and drying the drawer organizers and reloading the drawer – leaving out the flatware we don’t really use anymore.

What can you clean in 5 minutes?

“AFTER” photo: (“BEFORE” photo below)

Me, to PinkGirl: “Hey, take a look at this silverware drawer. See anything different?”

PinkGirl, crinkling brow, silently stares at the drawer.

Me: “It’s totally clean.”

PinkGirl: “ohhhhhh.”

Me: “So. I have a question. Why was the bottom of this drawer full of chocolate sprinkles?

PinkGirl, grinning: “Funny story….”

ummm hmmm.

(I had already gotten some of the sprinkles out before I remembered to take the photo.)

“BEFORE” photo:

April 25, 2011 Posted by | 5 minutes, freakishly organized, intentional living, laugh! | , , , , , | Leave a comment

baking is not my forte.

it’s a BOXED cake mix, for cryin out loud.

Attempt #1, which tasted like oil.

I was supposed to be baking a cake shaped like THIS for a children’s home:

My cake was so flat it would have looked like the bunny was roadkill. (sorry kids)

It was past midnight. I was leaning toward bailing on the bunny cake commitment.

Then FavoriteSon asked: Are you starting over?

Me: No. it’s too late to start over.

FavoriteSon, mocking me: “okay…but those kids can’t start over.”

fine.

So me and Betty Crocker, baking another cake at nearly one in the morning. The good news is that this cake didn’t taste like oil. It actually tasted like cake. Very dense cake, but cake. The bad news is that it was flat AGAIN. Like, pancake flat. Roadkill bunny flat.

So I switched gears and cut out the bunny cake shape in my Easter Bunny Cake blog post of 2009. The one that got over FIVE THOUSAND hits that day. My blog is getting insane traffic on this post and I had yet to make one of these cakes since my childhood.

I cut it out, iced it and PinkGirl decorated it this morning. Just so you can get a good understanding of the flatness of this cake, the mini-marshmallows littering the tray are taller than the cake.

and now there are sprinkles stuck to the bottom of my feet.

I suppose I should clean the kitchen floor, it appears cats don’t like sprinkles.

April 22, 2011 Posted by | food, holidays, laugh!, poor me some whine, status updates | , , | 2 Comments

note to self: STOP IT.

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.
2 Timothy 1:7

I have a love/hate relationship with a certain praise team song I lead. I actually love the song. I just hate the very first note of the first verse. Or maybe it just hates me. The latter seems unlikely, I know.

The last time I sang this song, the instruments played the intro, got right up to the first verse and …

I didn’t have it.

I looked at the worship leader at the moment I was supposed to sing and shook my head. He started the song and turned it over after the first line.

When I talked to him later he said, “you’re just over thinking it.”

I tend to do that.

Just an hour earlier, I had walked into the music room for the pre-service rehearsal and the worship leader and the drummer were both there. I listened to them play and after a few minutes I recognized the guitar intro to Mighty to Save. The drummer recognized it and fell in. I absentmindedly came in on the right note. Fell in is more like it. I didn’t even try. Wasn’t even thinking about it.

simple.

It hadn’t always been simple. When I first learned the lead to Mighty to Save, I bought the Laura Story version, with the piano intro. Then I came to rehearsal and we didn’t have a pianist. We did have two guitars that day. And unfortunately, they each had chord charts in two different keys. I was standing closest to the guy with the wrong chart. I came on on the wrong note, but it fit, until midway into the verse, then it was glaringly obvious I was off.

Let the season of doubt begin.

After that, I had no confidence that I could come in on the right note. How could I have started on the wrong note and not even realized it? What if I did it again? How do I recover the song if I come in on the wrong note during worship? The music director offered to play my note on the flute for me. It got to the point where I believed I couldn’t do it without her.

I hated that.

I was determined to break my need for this crutch. I bought the Hillsong version of the song, with the guitar intro. I completely stopped listening to the piano version, even going to the extreme of turning off the radio if it began playing.

FINALLY.

I was able to begin on the correct note without the flute playing it in the background. I led the song multiple times over the next few months without a problem.

So what was different about the last time I sang it?

the piano.

After I came in so effortlessly at the beginning of the pre-service rehearsal, we added keyboard to the intro and rehearsed it again after everyone else had gotten there.

I couldn’t find the note. Actually, I have no idea if I could or couldn’t find the note, because I didn’t try. I just said, “I don’t have it.”

Season Two. The doubt was back. I wimped out during the rehearsal, so you know what happened when it came time to start the song during worship, I froze up. Chickened out. wimped.

Will I ever be able to start this song on the right note if I hear a piano? I don’t know. But I won’t ever know if I don’t try.

So the wimping out for fear of getting it wrong? I’m going to STOP IT.

Wimping out for fear of getting it wrong . . .

I’m betting there’s a lot more I wimp on than that one little note.

“Courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.”
Winston Churchill

April 21, 2011 Posted by | christian living, poor me some whine, pragmatic communion, praise team music, what I've learned, youtube | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

chops, props and Gilligan’s Island

Conversations of 4 people crammed in a truck: (while my van was getting a new transmission)

Me: PinkGirl! We’re early today! Good job getting ready!

FavoriteSon: Still later than I wanted to leave.

Me: hey. Give your sister some chops.

FavoriteSon: Props.

Me: Really? Thought it was chops, what does props mean?

FavoriteSon: I don’t know.

I look at FirstHusband

FirstHusband: I don’t know either.

Me: YOU don’t know? You know all kinds of useless information. It isn’t buried in there somewhere along with the theme songs to Gilligan’s Island and the Brady Bunch?

FirstHusband: Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, A tale of a fateful trip…

A little Google search later reveals props stands for “proper respect.” That makes sense. Unlike “give chops.” Or the premise behind Gilligan’s Island for that matter. A three hour tour? really? They took a LOT of stuff on that tiny little boat for just three hours. It’s a wonder it didn’t sink.

April 20, 2011 Posted by | family, laugh!, pragmatic commotion | | 3 Comments

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